“Now, I realize many of you are incredibly upset by our verdict, but in our defense, these laws are completely fucked up, and our responsibility as jurors was to rule in accordance with them. Perhaps you should focus your anger not on us, but the moronic—I might say insane—statutes we were charged with upholding.”

In Our Defense, These Were Some Pretty Fucked-Up Laws And We Were Ordered To Deliberate In Accordance With Them | The Onion - America’s Finest News Source